Nope, sorry, this is your reminder that it’s not time to give up. I know it’s hard, I know it fucking sucks, and I know you probably might maybe want to scream until you lose your voice. So do it.
What’s stopping you?!
Is it crazier to scream and let it out? Or nuttier to hold it in until you commit murder because you’re so frustrated you can’t help but watch the knife finally fly, so to speak?! Exactly. So scream.
I still say my favorite memory was the day that I was at the hospital screaming, years – decades – of anger, frustration, fear, disgust, vile anger, rage, all of it just escaping all at once like a volcano finally exploding.
It was bound to happen, and thank the Gods it happened in a safe space, where I was protected from the outside world, but I recognize that not everyone has that.
Not everyone has a safe space they can go to, so if you can, build yourself one.
What’s to stop you from soundproofing a room for you to scream in? What’s to stop you from going to the woods? What’s to stop you from going to the fucking desert? Wherever whatever it is you find or go, make sure it’s a safe space for you.
And if you can go alone, be alone with it all, with the universe, with the feelings. I won’t tell you to learn to fucking hug them because ugh, but what I will say is learn what they are. Take the time to divest yourself of the toxicity you’ve been holding onto.
Maybe that’s not screaming, maybe it’s painting, or sculpting, or throwing paint at the wall…but whatever it is for you, find a way to release, because I can promise you it’s holding onto that shit, that is keeping you sick.
And no, it’s not easy to just pick up and go into the woods and scream. Lots of folks have very valid reasons for not being able to go alone.
That’s when you ask for help, which is also not easy, but it’s fucking necessary, if it’s something you really want, and you feel you can’t move on without doing it, but you can’t do it alone…I urge you to ask for help.
It’s the only way to get anywhere in this world.
Sending all my love,
Devon J Hall, The Original Loud Mouth Brown Girl\
Loud Mouth Brown Girl 
2 responses to “It’s Not Over”
Letting out your feelings by screaming, cursing, letting everything out in a safe place in my opinion tends to be more effective than telling stories to people.
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You are not wrong!
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