Loud Mouth Brown Girl

Seven years of anything is a lot, but especially because I thought I’d be long dead by now, I’m surprised as fuck that we made it this far.

If you’ve been reading since the beginning of this story and you’re still here, please congratulate yourselves. You’ve been through Hell and back and come Hell or high water you’re still here, you’re still alive, fighting to see another day. I’m fucking proud of you, in case no one else has said it so far.

I’ve been through a lot in seven years and I am going to spare you all of the details but it’s been much. So here I am writing about mental health and I find that the one thing I’ve realized most in the last seven years is how privileged I am.

I was houseless and an entire community of people from around the world came together to help me raise funds so that I wouldn’t be alone on the streets, but safe in hotels with my mom, who also helped keep me safe.

I was protected, deeply and in every way possible from the harshness of houselessness, and I am forever grateful for that. There aren’t enough words to say how grateful I am, but I am now in a position to give back and I want to focus on doing that.

I’m not talking about just volunteering which I DO want to get involved in, in the summer, but I am talking about going back to work.

I’m ready.

I am going to start practicing my cannabis knowledge stuff so that I can apply at a dispensary and get some real hands-on experience working in the industry.

I know that lots of people have complaints about the “industry,” but that’s why I want to go and learn, I want to see what the people in the industry know that I do not so I can share that information with the patients who need it the most.

I want this year to be about setting down roots and letting myself grow. I want this year to be about evolution and leveling up. I want to learn, and I want to study hard so that I can earn the right to learn.

But but but.

That doesn’t mean that just because I want that stuff it’s going to happen overnight. I have to work really hard to get where I want to go and I finally have the space and time to do that, and if I don’t do it, then what the fuck am I even doing here?

Seven years ago when I had this website my motto was “We’ll see where we’re going when we get there,” and here I am, in this beautiful apartment with my gorgeous views, and stunning friends, ready to take on the world.

There’s just one problem:

I have absolutely no idea how to navigate the world outside the church. HOWEVER, I also have a solution…it’s tomorrow’s me’s problem.

Sending all my love,

Devon J Hall