Except yes you will because it’s really not a secret. I wear a ring on my finger because every time I don’t men, women, and yes even children, ask me if I’m married. Fuck they ask me even if I do wear the ring, so I Googled the question behind right-hand and left-hand rings on single women and this is the first thing that popped up.

It was started by the women who drank in the throes of Prohibition (hence the name cocktail ring). For the first time in American history, women were finally free of cumbersome dresses and had entered the workforce and the speakeasies, where they smoked and drank alongside men — the right-hand ring, then, became a symbol of the working woman’s earning power.

HouseBeautiful.com Article by BY SARAH SCHREIBER PUBLISHED: JUN 7, 2017

This is one of my favorite scenes from the film Sex and the City. The line “I draw the line at 50,” is so telling.

We, as women, in particular, all have that goal. That one item, or thing that when we get will be the glowing sign that we have made it. Not to the standards of other folks, but to the dreams and wishes of our own hearts. For some people it’s a house, that’s a massive achievement in its own right, but for for some of us it’s as simple as “I just want a ring that defines my era.” For me, it’s all the rings that I can fit on my fingers, which isn’t many.

I’m big. As in, I’m five foot nine and a half, I’m over two hundred pounds and I have size twelve feet. I’m a big person, not a little person, and even if I were little, I’d struggle with size, because let’s face it, every human on the planet, struggles with sizes of all kinds of things from jewels to clothing.

For me, my rings are my armor, I can only wear silver because I’m allergic to everything else but gold, and I can’t afford gold, so it’s like this thing that with each ring I move up. For years I didn’t wear rings because they kept being touched by men, and for me, it felt like a violation. When you touch my jewelry, you take or give energy that I am not necessarily wanting to give, or receive.

When I was studying art in the 90s, I learned that lots of folks where the official BDSM symbol as a way to secretly and quietly identify each other in public. Sometimes this would lead to a nod, and other times it would lead to lifelong friendships depending on the situation.

For me my rings are not about status, they are not about whether or not I am single, they are about rebelling against the idea that I shouldn’t be, just because I’m of a certain age.

Any ring given to me by a man, or that reminds me of a man has either been stolen or removed from my life, so I am not sure how I feel about men in particular – being the ones to offer rings. But what I am sure of is that if I had a Friend’s Character in my head, it would be Pheobe, obviously, because I was obsessed with her rings.

Many people don’t make rings for people who have size 10+ fingers, so when I find one that fits I hold onto it for all it’s worth in hopes that one day I’ll be able to pass them down to my children.

Rings are a fun way to dress up an outfit, or to remind yourself that your past self loved you enough to buy you something pretty.

Rings are a powerful way of reminding yourself that life may not be perfect, or even beautiful, and it is certainly not always expensive, but that doesn’t mean that the gift of the ring in YOUR hand, isn’t any less important.

So the next time you ask someone about their rings, be prepared, because those rings mean everything to them, whether they admit it or not.

Sending all my love,

Devon J Hall

Share Your Thoughts

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.