Brown Girl Art

I Need The Work

It’s hard for people to understand just how much work I put into this blog. I am working almost ten to twelve hours a day curating and creating content and most of that content is provided to you all for free.

LT says that I need to monetize the website, but the thing is that I like the way it looks and I already put adds on here for writers who need a little extra boost. I don’t want to clutter up the website with ugly banner ads.

I do need money however. I need to prove that I can make this blogging thing into a verifiable job. So I wrote a book, and now I realize just how much I genuinely need for this to be my job.

I need to prove to the world that I am making my time here matter, but more than proving it to the world I need to prove it to myself. 

So I have created other avenues of revenue for myself. First off there is the T-shirt Line, and then the Book as well as my premium content on Buy Me A Coffee.

People don’t realize just how much work goes into networking and building relationships so that you can sell your brand. I didn’t realize how much work it was going to take, that is for damned sure.

Now that I am doing all the things to get my name and brand out there I am absolutely exhausted. Like every day. Part of it is my anemia kicking my ass, but part of it is the hard work that keeps me going every day.

Now that I am an author, people are starting to come to me for advice, and it’s funny because they seem to forget that just because I can “give” advice, doesn’t mean that I am so great at “taking” advice.

Some days I sit here and stare at my computer and wonder what more I could possibly be doing, until I realize that a lot of what I do on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram are repetitive.

I need to be creating, but part of me loves the networking more because I like learning about what other people are doing.

A year into doing this blog and I still haven’t found anyone who sees the world the way I do, who is doing the same kind of mental health focused blogging that I do, who also happens to be a woman of color.

The frustrating part comes in when I try to explain what it is that I am doing to other people. They don’t get it, most people don’t see blogging as a full time job, but it is if you want it to be.

The pay is shit, but putting the work and the content into the world matters to someone there for it matters to me.

Being successful will come in time, this I know, I just haven’t found that thing yet that separates me from the rest. I have confidence in myself and in my work ethic. I absolutely know that I can make this work, I just need a little more time and a lot more creativity to get through the day.

I can do this and so can you.

Sending all my love,

Devon J Hall

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