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Finding God

For the purposes of my own spirituality when referring to God, I will use the terms They, Them, and God, because I do not personally believe that God has a gender identity.

Right now Death is having a field day, Death is dancing around the globe, taking one life after another, without really caring about who these people are and why they are so important to us, which makes their lives all the more important, because these people are dying in the middle of a pandemic.

People are having a really hard time with it because they can’t go to Church, which is a place that brings solace and comfort to those who are in pain and in sorrow, I get it.

I miss going to Church, I miss having a place to go to worship, to be at peace, to be one with the Universe. I miss having that place that is sacred that I can go to, and feel like the Universe is listening to me.

But I also like being alive.

The risk is not worth it as far as I am concerned, but I think that’s because I’ve become comfortable talking to God every day, all day. We have long drawn out silences, and sometimes I talk and sometimes God responds and sometimes God doesn’t, but in a million tiny ways I feel God with me at all times.

Even when I am angry, sad, hurt, miserable, happy, joyus, whatever I am feeling God is there with me, they are in the people I talk to online, they are there in my dreams.

I remember once having a dream about this valley, everything was brown and orange, and it was so beautiful and calming that I remember saying out loud the only word I could use to describe what I was seeing was “God”.

Okay that’s a lie I wasn’t dreaming I was meditating. The point is, God is with us wherever we are, at all times, even when we’re having sex or masturbating.

To live a life with God means to understand that you don’t need a “place” although it helps, and you also don’t need other people. Your relationship with God is personal, and I am absolutely certain that God does not want you to die before it’s time, which is why I am telling you not to go to Church but instead to stay the fuck home.

You can still set a time each week to read the bible with your family, you can connect over the phone or Skype if you want to have Bible Study, there are a million ways to connect to other people so that you can feel connected to God, but it takes a little creativity which I am certain God would approve of.

If you make the effort to build your relationship with God, you will find that you don’t necessarily need the congregation as much as you thought you did, and it will be even more wonderful when we can meet safely, because we will appreciate those Sunday’s a lot more.

I understand perfectly the need for connection and friendship and fellowship in this time, in the middle of a pandemic if you can’t lean on your Church community who can you lean on? But there are responsible ways of connecting with your Church community that do not put vulnerable people at risk, and that is what God is asking of us right now.

I know that God is asking that of us because he created each of us and there are Scientists warning us that gathering in large groups is dangerous. I don’t think God wants us to ignore them.

The numbers don’t lie, the bigger the group the higher the chances there are of innocent people getting sick, and I know it’s easier to believe that our Governments lie to us because well let’s face it they fucking do all the time, but this time…the Science backs up what they are saying. This time the numbers don’t lie, they never really do.

I believe in God and I believe that God wants you to worship, and to share your love and be grateful for all of your gifts, I just think we need to be willing to adapt, because that’s the rule. Adapt or die.

Go for a walk, find God in nature. Find God in your heart, Find God within yourself and you’ll start to realize that God, the very essence of God is not a person or a deity, but an understanding between you and the universe that you will do your best to be your best version of yourself for those you love and care about. I’m still working on that part. We all are.

The choice is yours,

With all my love,

Devon J Hall

 

 

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